We thought that we were being all educationally innovative with our "Guess which STD?" Jeopardy game, featuring fun-filled images of condylomata lata and genital warts. However, it seems that we are totally outdone by Derek the Abstinence Clown, with his fun-filled juggling shtick. It is unclear to me what juggling has to do with safe sex (tossing pins leads to tossing machetes leads to, I don't know, neurosyphylis?). Derek has Austin the Seventh Grader balance a
On Austin's second attempt, Derek asks Austin to focus on his hopes and dreams. He also finally moves out of Austin's way, allowing the kid room to adjust his arm, so that the bottom of the cane can continuously counteract the torque of the top. Newton's Laws and Austin's Hope-Focusing conspire to ensure the cane's successful stability. From this analogy, the junior-high kids learn the imperative of avoiding drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, and especially, pre-marital sex.